Fun at the Space Gym

Canada Day Water Fun

Photo Catch-up

The sprinkler (and hole-y hose) have been the source of much amusement so far this summer:

Yet another manifestation of the Footwear Obsession:

Mei Le and Gus-Gus:

A "Wedding Outfit", conceived by Mei Le, and presented by Ebba:

Six Months Home - Can you believe it?

I almost can't ... tho it does seem a lifetime ago that I crawled off that plane from ETH on Xmas Eve, more exhausted that I think I have *ever* been!

But, time marches along, and despite some really rough days early on (and still occasionally), I'd say we are making pretty good progress at stabilizing as a Family of Four. We have a basic routine, Ebba sleeps most nights through (makes a big diff to my sanity!), and the girls are getting along better and better. Mei Le is really coming into her own as a Big Sister, and now understands how to help keep Ebba distracted when fussy, helps her with dress-up (even if Ebba doesn't want to!), and seems less competitive for attention (understanding that Ebba sometimes needs more attention).

Coinciding (almost) with this auspicious semi-anniversary, was Ebba's 18-mo old milestone. We have to keep reminding ourselves that she's only that old (still a baby, really), because she is just so CAPABLE for her age. She is amazingly physically co-ordinated for her age (we think):

To date, she can:

• Run, skip, dance, twirl;
• Feed herself (sometimes needs a little help loading her spoon/fork);
• Drink from a regular cup;
• "Wash" herself in the tub;

She LOVES Abba Music (a spin-off from Mei Le's former obsession with Mamma Mia), and will point at the CD player and ask for music when she wants to dance. She's even got some cool disco moves!

On the health front, we had our second visit to the children's hosp for the results of all those blood tests they took in April. All normal, with the exception of slightly low iron levels, so we are adding some diff multi-vitamins with iron to top her up. I also think we have amanged to eradicate the dreaded Giardia parasite - last two follow-up tests have been clear - one more to go before we can officially declare victory. Hearing test next week (standard for intntl adopted kids). Then we go back in early Dec for an assessment of development, attachment, etc.

On the behavioural front, she is settling down ... biting is dramatically reduced (with the occasional slip - esp on Mei Le, who is too soft to protest sufficiently to scare Ebba off!), hitting is reducing - and she seems to be understanding that it's not Approved Behaviour, as she will sort-of hit, then look to me for feedback. We are training "No-Hit, Kiss" as I did "No Bite, Kiss" to help her learn appropriate behaviour. I admit to often being frustrated/freaked out by this "violent" beh and the fact that she seems not to learn from my (often very loud) corrections ... but have to remind myself that she *is* only 18 mo old, and may not be ready or able to control her beh well enough to stop completely. Patience, Mom!

Food-wise, she eats most things - tho not always predictably. She does seem to prefer tomato-based things, and spicy things. Yesterday she discovered hummus & pita, and mowed through a bunch of that, repeatedly asking "More?"

Vocabulary update:

• "Helly" for Helen, our babysitter
• "Dus-dus" for Gus, our Pug (who I usually call "Gus-Gus")
• "Water", "Bath"
• "joo" for juice
• "Wok" for walk

So, that's where we are. Will post some new pics in a separate post.

Health Update

Ebba has been a robust and outwardly healthy baby ever since we got home, despite the usual snuffles and coughs of the winter season.

We have, however, had a few health issues arise ...

1. She had/has Giardia (a GI parasite) - this was detected by a faecal exam soon after getting home. We treated it, then re-tested clean. However, follow-up testing reveals that the little bug-a-boos still lurk - so we are onto treatment regimen #2 - longer this time. Giardia can be stubborn to get rid of. She has been pretty much asymptomatic (can see diarrhea, bloating, cramps), and I suspect she has had this parasite for most of her little life.
2. Her TB (Mantoux) test came back positive - likely a result of infant vaccination, but possible an indicator of latent TB. So, we are now about 1 mo into a 9-mo trt regimen for that.

She is getting resigned to the constant syringing of yucky-tasting liquids into her mouth - but it's no fun.

Ebba's First "Boo-Boo"

Ebba scraped the side of her pinky finger a couple of weeks ago - and so earned her first bandaid. She was intrigued - and it stayed on for all of an hour or so.

More Sisters ...

One Month In - Corner Turned

Saturday, Jan 17 was the 1-mo anniversary of my "taking possession" of Ebba, and her joining our family. We've come a long way since then, and I believe I can safely say we've turned the corner and are settling in well as a family.

Ebba seems much more comfortable with us, is attaching wonderfully, and the girls are well on their way to becoming sisters - with all the ups and downs that includes. Thankfully, I seem to be attaching well to Ebba, as well, and am feeling a lot less tired and panic-y. Each day seems more normal and manageable. There are still some moments of exhaustion and frustration - but I think that's normal!

Phew!

Yes - we're still alive!

And doing fairly well, actually. Tho Ebba has had a head cold that started Mon eve and was feverish and pukey most of yesterday and all last night. Not much sleep was had - at least by the adults in the house. Thanks to the gods for acetaminophen (sp?) suppositories!

I started back at work on Monday - the curse of the self-employed: no parental leave. At least I work from home. So, Ian and I are juggling, and on the days she's here, Mei Le's babysitter oversees the girls playing (tho we change and feed Ebba). It's not ideal, but will have to do until the end of the month when my work situation improves.

My daily nap program has fallen by the wayside this week. Sigh. But am managing to continue to feel a little more normal each day. As we settle into our new routine, I find myself feeling more capable and confident about the demands of this new parenting (two kids!). So, each day our family of four evolves and solidifies.

Still haven't had a minute to download my pics from the trip to ETH - hopefully soon!

Thanks so much to all of you for your encouraging comments & emails, for sharing your experiences, and for your offers of virtual casseroles! All much appreciated - and helpful!

One week later ...

So, we've been home just over a week now ... and I can honestly say this was one of the hardest weeks of my life - no exaggeration. Don't worry, Ebba is fine ... but the stress and fatigue of the trip took its toll on me, leaving me virtually crippled with exhaustion and panic.

It wasn't pretty. At my worst, I was convinced we had made a terrible mistake adopting again, and was trying to figure out how to undo it all. Too tired to be rational, I was not able to see Ebba as my daughter - rather as a disruptive force. I did not feel at all maternal towards her - and it scared me.

I met with our social worker to talk about the adaptation process, and my difficulties. We reviewed the lead-up to the trip (rushed!), the trip itself (draining), the travel home (hellish), and the settling in at home (normal but stressful) and came to the understanding that the rush, stress, and upheaval of it all had simply worn me to a frazzle. So, I was "prescribed" to rally the troops to help out, nap 2-3 hrs/d for a week or two (I like that part!), and let Ian hold down the fort. So, more or less, that's what we are doing.

Mei Le is really coming around. When we first got home, she was sick with a bad head cold - so extra needy - which made it very hard on me to balance competing demands. However, she is now healthy, and despite the occasional grumble, is seemingly enjoying her new role as big sister.

I feel a lot better already, and Ebba and I are doing better, too. She is settling into our routine pretty well, considering, and seems quite at home here. Still not sleeping the nights as she did in Addis (sigh!), and when she wakes in the night, she will not tolerate being put back into the crib, so one of us sleeps on the extra bed in her room with her on/beside us. Can't do that forever, but for now it works.

I can't say I'm in love with her yet, but I get glimpses of it ... I am optimistic we will muddle through these early weeks/months, and be ok in the end.

Off to nap!